…between the sheets.

Heather and I had physicals this morning, and found our new doctor. Our insurance plan doesn’t require us to choose a primary care physician; we can go to any damn doctor we want in our network. This actually makes it harder to choose one, because unlike with plans that might lock you in to a certain provider, I feel like I need to make a wise choice since I have so many options.

The physical went well; I’m not quite as fit as the president, but my blood pressure is healthy and I don’t seem to have any abnormalities.

The doctor did recommend I undergo a sleep study, to investigate some snoring and breathing issues I may want to address. I’m intrigued at the idea of sleeping overnight in a lab, with wires attached to me and cameras monitoring me.

  • Will they be able to analyze my somnambulatory killing sprees dream patterns?
  • Will the bed be as comfortable as our bed at home, or will it be an unforgiving hospital bed, thus tainting their results significantly?
  • Will they allow me to hit the snooze bar in the morning? If not, I’ll mumble “You’re screwing up the experiment” and throw pillows at them.
  • From my reading on the web, it appears that most sleep labs require you to shower before you leave. Is there a reason for this? Do they study me in there, too? Why can’t I shower at home?

6 Responses to “…between the sheets.”

  1. Amber



    They should really come to your place and hook all the wires and whatnot to you. Eliminate any possible variables that might screw it up, you know.

  2. Cindy



    I can save you a lot of time, you snore and have lousy sinuses, from your Mom

  3. duane



    I want to start a band called the somnambulatory killing sprees. And I want it to be a folk band. Oh yeah. I just got really excited…

    As for sleeping like that, NO WAY. They would find out that I cannot sleep when I am hooked up to wires and people are watching me. I would have to be completely wasted for that to work.

  4. Garrett



    I think that’s why they gave me a prescription for Ambien.

  5. Amber



    Duane - can I be your first groupie?

  6. duane



    Amber, as long as you don’t mind being alone… But, here’s hoping that we would be an awesome band!

    And Garrett, perhaps I should go to one of these sleep deprevation specialists. I seriously can’t sleep every night, and end up going to be at 2 and tossing and turning for an hour to fall asleep… perhaps I need to ride the Ambien unicorn to the valley of sleepy elves and dreams.

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